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[fics_by_maple]

Within You, Without You - Ch 2 - This Boy

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Ginny approached Harry with drinks in hand. Under the blazing June sun, she reflected back to the Christmas holiday, six months earlier. It had been her last day at home before returning to Hogwarts for her final term. She’d never forget how unexpectedly that day had developed.

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“…and here’s a tin a biscuits I made; I really think I got it right this time,” Hermione was saying. Ron met Ginny’s eyes behind Hermione, shaking his head vigorously but giving Hermione an affectionate pat on the back.

Ginny had to change the subject, to avoid laughing. Apparently Hermione still wasn’t a very good cook. “Oh, and what’s the big one?” she asked as Ron put a large, hatbox size package on the table.”

“I’m sorry, Ginny. Actually, this one is for Harry. It arrived this morning,” Hermione said.

“Oh, well, why did you bring it? Wasn’t Harry home?” Of course she realized the answer as soon as the words left her mouth. “He wasn’t home this morning because he wasn’t home last night, was he?” Ginny dearly wanted to throw something or hex a hole in the wall, but she figured doing so just might give away the fact that she was bothered by this information - something she wasn’t willing to admit to anyone else, let alone herself. Instead, she just shrugged and offered them a cup of tea.

Another hour passed before the flames in the hearth blazed green, and suddenly Harry tripped out of the Floo and into the kitchen.

Ginny noticed immediately how the hair around the base of his neck was damp and sticking to his skin. His face was flushed pink, and his jumper and robe appeared disheveled just enough so that he looked as though he’d been hurrying.

“Good morning! Sorry. I would have Flooed over with you guys, but I slept late,” he said looking at Ron, and avoiding Ginny.

Ron handed him a cup of tea, and stooped low to talk into his ear. He was whispering but Ginny still heard, “Truth’s already out, mate, sorry.” Ron gave him a wry grin and took his seat next to Hermione.

Harry looked embarrassed. Ginny thought it was at least a little comfort that he wanted to keep his overnight excursions secret from her. She was also thankful that he had taken the time to shower. On her last day with him, she could remember him smelling like Harry, and not like that tart.

“Oh, Harry, this parcel arrived for you,” Hermione said. “It was so big. I thought it might be important.”

“I’m not expecting any packages. I’ve been waiting for Hedwig with a letter from George, but that’s all.”

They all shifted uncomfortably at Harry’s mention of their brother. Ron spoke up quickly to keep the mood light.

“Better watch out then, Harry; might be a collection of knickers from your fan club,” Ron said, chuckling. Harry had received numerous love-letters and packages of sweets after his defeat of Voldemort.

While Ron refilled their teacups, Hermione and Ginny were sitting at the end of the table, gossiping furiously about Fleur.

No one was paying much attention when Harry opened the brown paper wrapping on the box, untied the string and lifted the lid. They all jumped when Harry let out a choked yell of horror. Ginny looked up at him, but he was already pale and fleeing from the room. Ron immediately took his wand in hand and aimed it at the box as he lifted the lid and cautiously peeked inside. Ginny was on her feet when Ron’s eyes went wide, and he twisted his face in disgust as he slammed the lid shut again.

They could hear the sound of Harry retching just outside the door.

“What is it?” Hermione asked, eyes wide as she quickly went to the box.

“No, Hermione, don’t!” Ron exclaimed, grabbing her by the arms. He was pale and his eyes were red as he looked from her to Ginny and then back again. “It’s Hedwig. She’s dead. Been killed.”

The sound of pumping blood filled Ginny’s ears, and she barely heard Hermione sobbing into Ron’s chest. Every heartbeat seemed to reverberate in her chest, and every breath of air rushed straight to her brain. She methodically took her robe from the stand next to the door and put it on, grabbing Harry’s as she went outside.

Ginny’s mind swirled in confusion and disbelief as she let instinct pull her in Harry’s direction.

Harry’s fame and her family’s notoriety in association with him were usually just annoying and caused them to have plan ahead a little for their outings. However, being in the public eye did bring out the strangest people as well. They all received occasional threats from some loon over one thing or another. It was usually pureblood sympathizers or relatives of Death Eaters and the like. However, nothing of any consequence had happened since the attack on Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes right after the war ended.

Ginny made her way slowly over the dead grass and rocks, clutching her robe tightly as the bitter cold wind blew through her. The ground was still frozen, and it felt as though it would snow again soon.

Harry was sitting under a big oak tree just at the edge of the open field where her family played Quidditch.

Without thinking about what she did, Ginny just took what action felt right. She sat against the tree trunk behind Harry and put her hands on his back. Harry trembled under her touch. He turned around to face her, looking into her eyes.

He was pale, and his eyes and nose were pink from grief and cold. She thought she had never seen him look so desperate.

“Why, Gin? Why would someone do it?” His voice was strained, and he looked at Ginny as though honestly hoping she could provide him with an explanation.

All she could do was shake her head and hold her arms out to him. He leaned into her embrace, resting his head against her chest and letting out his sorrow over the cruel murder of his childhood friend.

Ginny’s heart broke for him, and there were no adequate words to comfort him with. All she could do was hold him close. She threw his cloak over him and held him tight, stroking his hair and kissing his head. This much felt right.

She didn’t know how much time had passed before Harry’s tears had subsided. He continued to hold her tight, his head nestled closely into her. Ginny was willing to remain out in the cold all day long, but unwilling to let go of him for anything.

When they heard footsteps approaching behind them, Harry sat up. He looked hard at Ginny for a moment and cupped her cheek with his hand.

They both looked up to see Ron and Hermione come around the tree. Hermione held that horrible box, now wrapped in white cloth. Ron had a pick axe over his shoulder and shovel in his other hand, which he held out to Harry.

“I’m sorry, Harry,” Ron said, as Hermione sniffed behind them. “We’ll find out who did it, but right now let’s put her to rest, okay?”

Harry wiped his wet face with his sleeve and stood up, taking the shovel from him. He stood, looking confused by the shovel in his hand and looking curiously at Ron.

“Some jobs are best done the Muggle way, ‘s what Dad says,” said Ron with shrug. He led the way toward a jetty of large rocks. Near a holly bush, Ron began to swing the pick, breaking up the rocks and icy earth while Harry dug it up.

Ginny and Hermione huddled together, shivering in the bitter wind. They watched while the boys fatigued themselves with the work. Ginny understood why Ron suggested doing this without magic. Harry needed the physical task to throw himself into.

They all buried Hedwig together that day. Ginny held Harry’s hand outside in the cold, just silently supporting him. When the snow began to fall, Harry was ready to walk away.

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The place under the oak tree felt entirely different today, with its green surroundings and the distant happy sounds of her family in the background.

“Harry?” Ginny said as she approached him, not sure what his mood would be, standing in this place where they last held each other during a time of grief. Ron had said Harry wasn’t sullen, only remembering, so she was going to gamble on her brother’s insight.

Ron had got it right, because the handsome face that greeted her indeed looked quite content. His hair was windswept and his face pink from the sun.

“Thirsty?” Ginny asked as she handed him his glass. She noticed how odd this simple act appeared, how domestic it was. What was stranger was that she didn’t feel uncomfortable about doing this. It felt good to take care of Harry.

“So, about that lousy Quidditch playing, Harry,” she teased, which was always her easiest approach. “Am I going to have to give you Seeker lessons now?”

He smiled as he took a drink, and nodded.

“Yeah, you might. But I think I’d still play lousy with you around.”

All the muscles in her jaw tightened as she willed herself not to grin stupidly, or blush too hard.

So he wants to flirt does he? I can do that, she thought to herself.

“Rubbish; you just need somebody to tell you what to do,” she said, taking the opportunity to lightly poke him in the stomach. She felt the muscles there flex under her fingertips. “Somebody to tell you when to dodge, and when to dive, and …when to reach out and grab it.” Before she knew it, she tossed her head back and flicked her ponytail over her shoulder.

What are you doing?! Why do you let Harry do this to you? She wondered if such feminine ploys were engrained in her blood. She’d have to speak to her mother about that.

“Ok, Gin, I’ll agree to that. You teach me how to be a Seeker again. Tell me when to… ‘reach out and grab it,’ yeah?” He tilted his head back just a little, smiling and exposing his neck to her.

Ginny wanted very much to be kissing her way up and down that neck, and wondered if he showed that part of himself deliberately.

“All right then. You’ll have to pay attention to all the instructions you are given, and no skiving off either.” She took a step closer, watching his chest rise with each intake of breath. “If you take up lessons with me… you can’t just quit right away.” She swallowed hard. Didn’t mean to take it quite that far. But he’s still smiling. Keeping her gaze fixed on his, she continued. “You’ll have to stick it out for a while. Could you handle that?”

Harry looked slightly awestruck, and nodded his head. “Yes ma’am,” he said in a deeper and gentler tone. “I can handle that.” Harry reached out toward her, but he didn’t seem to know what he was reaching for. His fingers settled on the ends of her shirttails, tied at her waist. “This is the best use of a Hogwarts uniform ever,” he said as he gently tugged on the tie and slowly raising his eyes back to hers. She took a tiny step closer, and he kept his hold onto the shirt.

“Yes, well, my wardrobe is right sad these days. I haven’t got much outside of school uniforms. Mum and I are going to Diagon Alley actually. I need quite a few things before starting work.”

“Yeah, going tomorrow?”

“It’s silly really, but I’m kind of looking forward to it. Mum and Dad seem to be doing better these days, you know with money and all. With Dad’s promotion and all the boys out of the house.” Ginny realized she had broken the flirtation between them, and regretted it. “Hey, you want to go for walk?” she asked, taking him by the wrist and tugging on him.

“Okay,” Harry said eagerly and he let her hand slip into his, and he held it tightly. They began walking and Ginny felt the familiar fluttering between her palms and heart pick up again when she realized they were holding hands.

She noticed his eyes linger off in the direction of Hedwig’s grave for just a moment. She knew she couldn’t make him forget the past entirely, but he seemed willing to focus on her for now, and that was enough.

They walked together hand in hand, talking easily together like they had been able to once before. The first few minutes of holding hands felt electrifying, but as they walked and talked it felt more comfortable and natural. Permission once given and received was enough.

Harry told her about his work this past year as an advisor to the new Auror training program. How he had been reluctant to take the assignment, but once they told him that they would be discussing his battles with Death Eaters and Voldemort anyway, he had reckoned he might as well be the one to discuss it.

She knew all about this of course, having heard the tales from him during Order meetings after the war and among her family members. But he now talked about his experiences more personally with her. Telling her honestly about the times when he was afraid and worried and about the funny things that happened along the way.

At one point during his story telling he released her hand, gesticulating wildly, and when he was done he casually took her hand again, and they continued walking.

They walked a wide circle around the Burrow, and the afternoon quickly passed while they talked.

When the shadows were longer than the rays of sunlight streaming through the trees, Ginny realized how much of the day was gone, and they found themselves back under the great oak tree. The two glasses on the ground near the trunk indicated that they had come full circle in more ways than one.

Quiet music broke through the air and they looked back towards the Burrow, seeing Ginny’s parents lighting the first lamps on the table where they had eaten lunch.

“Dad’s been playing that magical music box every evening since I’ve been home,” Ginny said, letting her gaze rest on the portrait of her childhood home. “I guess we should probably head back; they’ll be eating soon.” She spoke without enthusiasm as she turned back to Harry, who was studying her face intensely.

“Hey, Gin,” Harry began, his tone much deeper than it had been earlier. He stepped closer to her, and she took a step back, placing herself between the tree and Harry.

She looked up into his eyes and felt the relaxed comfort of being with Harry, her friend, fade back into the excitement of being with Harry, the man who looked at her like a woman, like he wanted her.

“Yes, Harry?” she said softly, wishing she didn’t sound so breathless.

He put one hand on the tree over her shoulder, leaning closer.

“You said earlier… that you would tell me when to reach out and grab it… remember?” He reached out and touched her now loose hair and fingered the waves as they tumbled down over her shoulder.

Ginny felt the fluttering feeling in her heart fall straight through her torso and settle between her legs. Were they still talking about Quidditch?

“Right… you don’t want to reach for it,” she said, playing along as Harry leaned in close enough to kiss her, but instead he barely grazed her jaw line and up to her ear with his lips, breathing against her skin, “until you are sure you’re close enough to take hold of it tightly…”

Harry leaned his body nearer, until his chest was just a breathing space distance from her breasts. His free hand moved to her waist, and he squeezed.

“… because you don’t want to ever let it go, once you’ve caught it.” Ginny tilted her chin upwards, encouraging him to continue to graze her neck with his lips.

“I’ll never let it go, Gin,” Harry said with strained desire in his voice, deliberately dragging his lower lip over her earlobe. His hand that gripped her waist was beginning to pull her close.

Ginny put both her hands along his ribs. She desperately wanted to cling to him, and let the oncoming darkness of night provide cover as they let their desire consume them.

But Ginny had controlled her desires and denied her feelings for years. She wasn’t going to let impatience derail her now.

“Harry,” she said in a stronger voice, clutching at his ribs, “Are you sure about that? I won’t let you say goodbye to me again. You’ll always be my friend, my family, but I won’t do something that makes it miserable for us to be together in my parents’ home again. Never.”

“I, well, Gin,” he stammered, which she took to mean that he hadn’t considered such commitment yet.

She gulped and pulled a nonchalant face. “No. That’s okay. I’ve never asked you to give more than you are willing to, but I’m not a girl anymore. I’m through playing around with my heart. I’ll only give you one chance to kiss me, Harry, and you can’t ever take it back if you do.”

With that, she held her breath and ducked under his arm and walked back towards the twinkling lights of the house.

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Harry thought his heart stopped beating when Ginny walked out of his arms and away from him. He understood why she did it though. She wasn’t one for playing games. He had hurt her too much over the past two years to expect her to get over it in one afternoon.

He would never let her go again. He would show her that he was ready to be with her for good. He would run after that woman and prove it to her.

He would, just as soon as he adjusted his trousers so that he could walk again.

After calming the aching bulge that impeded his pursuit, he followed her. She had gotten so far ahead of him now he was afraid she would be thinking that he wasn’t going to follow her. He couldn’t bear the thought that Ginny would think for even a moment that he didn’t want her. All of her.

He began to run after her, seeing that she was just about to the Burrow’s inner garden. He carefully jumped over small rocks and shrubs that were hidden in the shadow of dusk.

The music from Mr. Weasley’s wireless was growing stronger as he approached. All of Harry’s focus was on the petite redhead, now storming away ahead of him. He barely registered the presence of her family and their whereabouts as he drew closer.

He had to take the one chance Ginny said she’d give him. To call her ante, and kiss her and prove that he didn’t ever want to take it back.

He gained on her quickly, passing through the gate into the garden and overtook her right in the center of the courtyard. He reached out and grabbed her hand, spinning her around and pulling her flush up against him.

“I’ll never say goodbye again; I swear it,” he said, looking into her bright brown eyes. Then Harry wrapped his hand around her back and slowly pulled her up on her toes, while he leaned down to claim her lips with his.

He felt her small hands on his back sliding up to his shoulder blades. Harry felt their magic spark and his heart overflowed with a joy he could never have anticipated. This is what he had been waiting all his life for. As he felt Ginny’s lips press against his, the heartfelt words sung over the wireless settled into his subconscious:

At last… My love has come along… My lonely days are over…

Harry had never been more grateful for Mr. Weasley’s fondness for gadgets and machines than at that moment.

Harry and Ginny slowly parted, making promises to each other with their eyes and their smiles. Harry knew at last that Ginny was his.

And then Harry felt the air whoosh out of his lungs as he realized where they were and who was surrounding them. With Ginny’s head pressed firmly onto his chest, his chin resting on top of her head, he closed his eyes, imagining several Weasley hexes flying at him - at the very least a shoe aimed at his head.

When none came, he opened his eyes and cautiously looked around him.

He saw Fred and Charlie playing ‘toss the gnome.’ They were stifling chuckles, pretending not to see them, but Fred winked at him.

He saw Bill sitting next to Fleur while she ate at the table. His hand rested on her belly, round with their first child. They were whispering rapidly to each other, and Fleur waved her delicate fingers at him.

He saw Mr. Weasley sitting on the cool grass with his arm around his wife. Mrs. Weasley had one hand pressed over her mouth while using the other to clutch her husband’s shirt. They both looked emotional, but pleased.

Harry needed the approval from one last Weasley: the one, apart from Ginny, that meant the most to him.

Ron and Hermione were swaying to the music a short distance away. Ron held a bottle of butterbeer in one hand while holding Hermione close to him with the other. Hermione’s head rested against his chest and she smiled brightly while her eyes glistened. Ron looked him straight in the eye while he took a slow sip of his butterbeer, and then raised his bottle in the air to Harry, a silent toast. Nodding, he gave Harry a smirk.

Harry took a deep breath, sighing with relief. He pulled Ginny tight once again, causing her to look up at him. He kissed her once more, hoping this evening would never end.


~^~^~^ Continue to Chapter 3

A/N: Thank you for all the kind reviews, they mean so much to me!

I thank MrsPadfoot for her pre-beta work and Belovedranger for her awesome beta work.